Tales of the C-Suite

When the pandemic arrived earlier this year it ushered in a new world of introspection. Many women I know started to question the high-energy, super-busy, relentless way of operating. Bouncing between meetings, projects, family commitments, managing teams, managing upwards, and generally juggling life and career.

Have you ever felt that there is simply no time to breathe?

I know through my own experience, and that of other successful people, that we go further in life and career by periodically taking time to stop and rest.

Pausing, being in stillness, in the absence of purposeful striving, leaning back to rest rather than leaning in. It invariably leads to transformative leaps forward in insight and understanding, in life and career.

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In recent interviews, the actor Matthew McConaughey has talked about taking a 20-month sabbatical from working.

He used this time to read the diaries he has kept since he was 14 years old, pen his memoir of sorts, and exercise the power of saying, “No, thank you”. Which in his case meant turning down a $14.5 million offer for a role in a romantic comedy, and know the joy of doing jigsaw puzzles in quiet seclusion with his family.

So, what is a sabbatical?

Traditionally, a sabbatical is a period of paid or unpaid leave that is granted to an employee, so they may study or travel. This type of time off is common in higher education settings and is usually granted after seven years of service.

Employers benefit from the new skills of the employee such as a qualification or technical skill enhancement, innovation and new thinking. It brings a renewed and refreshed attitude to work. It can form part of a highly effective retention strategy for key staff.

I don’t think I know anyone, outside of academia, who has taken a sabbatical from their corporate career. A gap year after university, yes. Maternity leave, yes. A secondment to HO or a branch office in another country, yes, but not so much these days.

“She’s away on sabbatical,” is a phrase rarely heard.

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What are some options for taking time out to study, pursue an interest, or simply check in on the state of our lives?

In the absence of a formal sabbatical policy at your place of work, reading widely outside of your usual genre, attending courses at a community college (in person or online), listening to inspired podcasts on non-work-related topics, and retreats can be very do-able. Journaling, too, is often the best kindling for igniting the next phase in your life and career.

Becoming the leader others want to follow requires continuous exposure to new ideas and purposefully examining the state of your life.

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Former Michelle Obama speechwriter Sarah Hurwitz spoke about taking a much-needed break after the whirlwind of working in the White House in an interview for NBC’s TODAY show.

“It’s funny, I think people expect I was in some great existential crisis or it was like a spiritual journey but the truth is, I broke up with a guy I had been dating, I was 36, and I happened to hear about an Introduction to Judaism class at the local Jewish Community Centre.

As an adult, studying these ancient Jewish texts, I realised that there was so much wisdom about how to be a good person, how to live a worthy life and how to find really deep spiritual connection. I thought, wait a second, there is a lot here for me, that I think can actually transform my life.

I remember reading this line from the Torah, which is Judaism’s key sacred text, that says that we are all created in the image of God. As American scholar, author and rabbi Yitz Greenberg says, it essentially means that we are all infinitely worthy, we are all equal to each other, and we are all totally unique.”

She recalled the words she wrote with Michelle Obama and found there was a spiritual connection.

“Mrs. Obama was talking about educating girls in developing countries, she was saying each of these girls is infinitely worthy, they’re equal to every child on this planet, with a world of potential that is uniquely theirs. She said: ‘We want to make sure that every door is open to girls like you.’ And so that really changed how I thought about what I was doing.”

Sarah also attended a long silent meditation retreat, that had a profound effect. “I found it to be a surprisingly emotional, really transformative experience,” she said.

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A sabbatical or retreat is different from a holiday. It is a break from work for intentional rest, reflection and renewal.

I have been fortunate enough to attend two week-long retreats for women business owners and entrepreneurs in recent years, in 2017 and again in 2019. This quote from Thomas Friedman’s book, Thank You For Being Late, best describes the experience:

“When you press the pause button on a machine, it stops. But when you press the pause button on human beings they start.

You start to reflect, you start to rethink your assumptions, you start to reimagine what is possible and, most importantly, you start to connect with your deeply held beliefs. Once you’ve done that, you can begin to reimagine a better path.”

To get you started, here is a suggested reading and listening list.

Reading:

• The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown

• Everything is Figureoutable by Marie Forleo

• Chillpreneur: New Rules for Creating Success, Freedom and Abundance on Your Terms by Denise Duffield-Thomas

• Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain

• Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers (an oldie but still a goodie!)

Listening:

• Jonathan Fields’ Good Life Project podcast

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As we enter what is often a reflective and contemplative time of year, and especially so this year, will we simply note what’s happened? Or accept the invitation to create the next leg of the journey in life and career, and the next, and the next?

Reimagine what is possible. Be the obvious choice to the C-Suite.

Postscript

“What if we look at time not as a clock that ticks away, but as a collection of regularly repeating opportunities to reset and redirect our intentions and actions and, in doing so, let our lives tell a richer, more engaged, and meaningful story?” asks Jonathan Fields of the Good Life Project.

That’s what I’m thinking about as I head into my own sabbatical from working.

I am going to invest the first part of 2021 back into my own learning, reflections, and discussions with a cross-section of high achieving people. To pause and find deeper insights and connections and then come back and share them with you.

To help you make the transformative leap forward in your life and career.   

I eagerly await the moment when we will connect again in the future.

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How, I’ve been wondering, do we decontaminate our home after a day’s work? How can we create space for rest and leisure, and protect ourselves from overwhelm and overwork?

What I’m hearing is that the global shift to remote working undoubtedly has upsides: more flexibility, no commute, more connection with what’s “local”, a return to simple pleasures.

BUT there are plenty of downsides: longer days, endless Zoom meetings, more emails and, most significantly for the women I speak with, the almost impossible challenge of switching off from work when it is right there in your home with you.

These women are starting to burn out.

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I had a memorable conversation with a colleague recently. She lamented, “I realise I am one of those who have moved into the category of living at work. It’s tough. Work is slamming me.”

Based in London, with a team spread across Europe, HO in New York and clients on every continent, this MD has worked hard to keep her momentum and motivation going this year. But it is getting harder as the weeks and months drag on.

She and her husband, also a senior manager in a multinational institution, have been working from home since April.

She went on to say, “Work is so with you. So present. There is this constant reminder that work is just an arms-length away. It’s so stressful.”

Rituals and habits have been crucial to her sense of balance. Every Friday, the laptops and other paraphernalia are packed up and moved off the dining room table and into a spare bedroom. And the door is closed. It’s a bit of a painful process, she says, but the benefits have been huge. Out of sight, out of mind.

She is intentionally creating space for a weekend.

Since the pandemic began, the very rhythm of our life has changed dramatically. There used to be weekends. Weekends were fundamentally different from weekdays.

We need to create them now that we are working from home, with rituals to make sure we are hyper-aware of the transition for work to home, from workday to evening leisure, from weekday to weekend.

“I said to my husband that we are packing up the home office over Christmas and putting everything away. And it’s not coming back out until the Christmas decorations come down!”

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Create routines to decontaminate your home and slough off the workday

Here are some suggestions shared by my own mentors and coaches and one notable Academy, Emmy and BAFTA Award winner:

Habit Stacking

You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine.

John C. Maxwell

This sounds good in theory yet forming new habits and breaking the norms of expectation can be hard work.

Valerie Khoo, CEO of the Australian Writers’ Centre, recommends using the Habit Stacking technique to build supportive routines. She says the trick to forming new habits is to attach the new habit to the day-to-day ones you do without thinking.

The Habit Stacking Formula = After/Before [CURRENT HABIT], I will [NEW HABIT].  

For example: After brushing my teeth, I will do ten push ups.

Another example: During December, after stacking the dishwasher each night, I will turn the alerts off all my electronic devices.

Valerie promises that these can be quite fun to do, especially if you’re stacking with a daily habit you enjoy. For example, if you enjoy a cup of tea at the end of the workday, your new habit might be to close all documents, apps and windows and logout of email while you drink it.

Unhelpful habits have likely come from unconscious habit stacking. If you currently browse through social media while drinking your cup of tea, that’s a routine you’ve learnt over time from linking these two habits together.

This week I encourage you to select one thing that you are willing to do to create a delineation in time and space between work and home. It can be big or small. And link this thing to an existing habit. 

For a deeper dive into why habit stacking is so powerful, “Atomic Habits” by James Clear is a very practical and hands-on guide to breaking bad routines and making good ones.

Decontamination

“Do you know how to create a workspace so that you know when you are working and when you are at home?” asks Michael Grinder, a master trainer in NLP and the science of non-verbal communication.

He says that for those working from home as a result of the pandemic, decontamination is the number one skill we need to master.

“We used to say, ‘we go to work’ and ‘we come home from work, to our home, our castle’. Now we are working inside our castle. You are contaminating the castle with work.

So, you’ve got to figure out how to cue yourself when you are at work and when you are at home.

I’ve heard of someone who uses a scarf as her cue. When she has the scarf on, she is indicating to all members of the household, ‘I’m at work’. When she takes the scarf off, she’s not at work.”

Intentionally managing non-verbal cues can be very powerful.

They send a very loud message to yourself and to other members of your household – turn off all the dings, beeps and chimes that notify you of an incoming messages. Close the lid of your laptop; turn off the overhead lights and turn on a table lamp; change your shoes or clothes; close the door to your home office if possible. Even simply standing up and moving to sit in a different chair around the dining room table signifies the transition. 

Sloughing Off

In the HBO series, The Undoing, Nicole Kidman plays Grace, an affluent New York City therapist with a charismatic British husband who cures children’s cancer (played by the charming Hugh Grant).

In one of her countless recent interviews, Nicole Kidman says one of the most difficult aspects of the role was staying in the psychological state of her character as she “traverses the whole emotional gamut in relation to her relationship, her family, her life being taken and turned upside down.”

“It was a really uncomfortable state to exist in because it wasn’t the place I wanted to be in,” she says. “Obviously it’s much nicer to be doing something where it’s filled with joy and love. And this was not; this was far more of a rollercoaster, the demise of a relationship and the pendulum swinging back and forth all the time.”

She goes on to say how incredibly important it was to slough off the character after filming was complete. In the days and weeks after, she did this by taking the time to rediscover the joy of swimming, walking barefoot on the beach and bathing in oils, before moving on to her next venture.

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Letting go of the day

Right now, this week, this month, this year, we need to establish routines and rituals to decontaminate our home and slough off the workday, more than ever.

And we do this with effort and intention. We do this through intentional routine and creating moments.

Reclaiming access to the capacity to step out of work and step into home.

This week, as you reach out to pull the lid of your laptop down to the closed position, watching the screen fade to black, say this mantra, inspired by Sarah Edelman PhD:

It is time for me to let go of the day.

The experiences of the day are over, and I can release them.

If there are any issues I need to deal with, I can do that tomorrow.

Now it is the time for me to release all the thoughts of the day,

And let the rhythm of the day carry me away.

You can do this!

Be the obvious choice to the C-Suite.

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There are times in the lives of most senior executives when they take stock and consider what next.

Sometimes this is triggered by a major life event: a serious health scare, the children finally leaving home or a break down in their significant personal relationship.

Sometimes it is internal, like the soul searching after being passed over for that perfect promotion. And sometimes it is external, like the pandemic of 2020.

Or the company may trigger it through a round of restructuring, re-sizing and retrenchment.

I recall hosting a dinner party for a group of colleagues and friends. As the conversation flowed, it came to light that every single one of us had been made redundant at some stage in our career. And a handful had been made redundant two and even three times.

The 3 Rs: Restructuring, Re-sizing and Retrenchment are normal features of the career landscape in the modern world. As devastating and as personal as it may feel at the time, we will all be impacted by these events at some stage.

Consider these two case studies:

Case Study: Preparing for life transitions

Ann* is 49 years old and, as an executive director for a Top 50 ASX-listed company, she is the primary breadwinner at home. Her husband is an in-demand local builder. With no kids, no mortgage, a healthy nest egg in super, cash and shares, Ann’s situation would seem under control.

However, sadly, she lives with inoperable cancer.

Ann has been given the option to take voluntary redundancy.

 The question she has is simple:

“Can I afford to leave the company and chase my dream of becoming an advocate for equitable access to cancer services for all?”

Case Study: Preparing for redundancy

Helena* is an executive in her late 30s, married with two children. She believed her role was at risk of being made redundant and began preparing for the inevitable six months in advance.

Firstly, she found an employment lawyer to coach her through the negotiations, review the redundancy calculations, and terms and conditions. The $5,000 she spent on legal fees will result in a $50,000 increased payout and a greater sense of satisfaction that a fair deal had been achieved.

Helena invested in her skills by undertaking some short courses relevant to her next career step. She reached out to connect with her network and industry contacts and updated her LinkedIn profile.

She engaged a financial advisor to determine her preferred timing for triggering the redundancy event. To ensure the continuation of her income and life insurance – unencumbered by her employer.

“Doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.”

Oprah Winfrey

Because she took charge of the moment, Helena maintained her relationships with the CEO and the board, and left the company on her own terms. Her insurances continued and she stayed in control of the timing. She was ready to take the next career step when the redundancy offer was made.

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Response to redundancy and life transitions

If talk of redundancies starts making its way through your organisation, have a pre-emptive strategy in place. It will assist when navigating the change to finances, career, family and lifestyle. It also gives you control of how the redundancy is managed and, crucially, the timeframe in which it occurs.

Many high potential women initiate their own career change. But when the transition is forced by redundancy, there are several key steps that will help you maintain your sense of security, while negotiating the next phase of your life and career.

The first step is to break down your situation into short- and long-term goals.

Short-term

Assess your immediate financial situation, and work out what stop gap arrangements need to be put in place to support your lifestyle and commitments such as the mortgage and school fees. What are your day-to-day cash flow requirements? Break it down into what you owe and what you own.

Unencumbering yourself from your employer with super, insurance and shares may also be beneficial in the lead-up to your redundancy. Finally, try and put a timeframe around how long you think you might be in this situation.

Long-term

Proper planning for your lump-sum redundancy payout is crucial. A professional financial advisor can help you make the most out of it long term, and may also be able to negotiate a payout with your employer that is better in the long term. Depending on your age, there are other decisions that need to be made. Will you cash out any or all of your superannuation, or use your payout to invest in your super? You also need to be clear about the make-up of your lump-sum payout and the tax obligations for each component.

More often than not, people experiencing forced career transition or redundancy battle with financial stress, family pressures and fear of the unknown. But planning after retrenchment is too late. Starting a business or consultancy, changing your industry or profession, or securing another senior management position – most of which are not advertised – takes time and planning.

“You can’t make decisions based on fear and the possibility of what might happen.”

Michelle Obama

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Nine-point checklist for managing redundancy

The most empowering thing you can do when facing a possible redundancy is to be informed.

1. Think about what professional advice you may need. Such as an employment lawyer, financial advisor, tax advisor or career coach. Do this as soon as you suspect that your job may be at risk, and start to develop your redundancy strategy.
2. Entitlements – determine what benefit entitlements are coming your way. This may include any outstanding annual or long service leave due to you, pay in lieu of notice, and of course, payments you receive as part of your separation payment or golden handshake. Re-read your original employment contract.
3. Insurance – find out if there is a continuation option with your insurance cover. Most people’s insurance cover is through their employer’s superannuation fund and will cease when their employment ceases.
4. Tax implications – understanding the tax liability on your payout is important. Issues that can affect a payout include whether the redundancy is ‘bona fide’, taxes on lump sums and the tax treatment of any super monies you plan to withdraw.
5. Debt management – having a comprehensive budget can go a long way in managing your cash flow, expenses and financial commitments. Know your fixed and variable expenditures.
6. Savings – assessing the liquidity of your assets is integral in planning ahead.
7. Protect and maintain your professional relationships. Invest time in your professional networks, raise your profile and learn to network online – graduate jobs are advertised, most senior management positions are not.
8. Invest in yourself – self-care is vital for riding this out.
9. What next…? – Whether you are looking at re-employment or re-inventing yourself, allow sufficient time and space for reflection, knowing that the people who come out of these situations happier, more fulfilled and more successful than ever are the ones who take action now to create the life and career of their dreams.

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The psychological effects of redundancy

The late Apple boss Steve Jobs said in his 2005 address to Stanford University that being let go from the computer giant early in his career was “the best thing that could have ever happened to me”. He went on to form Pixar, finally had time to find his soul mate, and would eventually return to his former employer to turn it into one of the most successful businesses in history.

Unfortunately, it can be difficult to see the happy ending when you are in the middle of the job loss story. In the immediate aftermath, most people feel an overwhelming sense of loss, anxiety and anger.

A study in the UK medical journal Organization Studies[1] was drawn from formerly senior, highly paid male and female managers – aged 49 to 62 – who had lost their jobs in hostile circumstances. It found that those who fared best after being made redundant were those who saw the situation as an opportunity for growth, rather than the end of everything.

Those less successful in coping with the forced career transitions reported high levels of despair, feelings of devastation and acute depression. Faced with economic uncertainty and high-end financial commitments, many who’ve been made redundant rush into the job market with a stopgap mentality, often winding up in a job they don’t like.

When emotional trauma is mixed with financial pressures, it can be hard to take the glass half full approach, which is why getting professional advice and staying ahead of the game is so crucial.

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When your work environment is in a state of flux, there can be a slowing down and re-thinking of your financial goals. Reassessing what you really need, deeply considering your value, reconnecting with your passion, and redefining your career plans.

It is a time to re-evaluate, rethink, revisit, review, reassess, reconsider, re-connect, refresh and reignite.

It is a time to be ready.

So that when that next perfect opportunity comes your way, you will be ready to say, “Yes, this is the obvious choice for me.”

Be the obvious choice.

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[1] Y. Gabriel, D. Gray, H.Goregaokar, Organization Studies December 2010 vol. 31 no. 12 1687-1712

*Names and some personal details have been changed for privacy reasons.

This recent quip from a fellow businesswoman snapped me back in time. To when I was a senior executive, in an organisation going through a whirlwind of M&A activity.

In the middle of yet another major acquisition, I had a moment. A meltdown.

I remember it vividly, as if it were yesterday.

My son was in the early days of his first year at school. I had left the office early to go to the gym. We had arranged for my husband to come home from his work in time to relieve the nanny. We were doing OK, right?

Driving across the Sydney Harbour Bridge, I mentally checked my To-Do List: personal training session, a quick game of Wiggles Dominos with my son, cook dinner, our routine of toilet/teeth/tickles/story-time then off to bed. Eat dinner, make lunch for the next day. Then check and respond to emails to assuage my guilt at leaving the office that little bit early.  

And bake a cake for the school fundraiser the following day.

At about 11 pm I took the cake off the cooling rack to put it into the cake box. And I broke it.

Several chunks of lemon coconut cake dropped to the floor.

Then I dropped to the floor and sobbed for an hour. I was inconsolable.

Every now and again my husband would wander into the kitchen and ask, “Are you ok?”

“Yes, I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Do you want me to buy a cake in the morning?”

“NO!!”

Sure, I was doing all the right things that I knew were good for me:

– exercise

– nutritious home-cooked meals

– quality time with my family

– engaging with the school community

– tactile, right-brain activities like baking (“… they’re good for your creative problem-solving …”)

Yet some days it was a struggle.

Just to stand up, let alone “lean in, take risks, and pursue your career goals with gusto”.

It was around this time that I made the decision to stop ironing my sheets.

Because I came to realise that a working career is a marathon. That it is just not sustainable to operate at a high-energy, super-busy, over-scheduled level all the time.

It’s so easy to get caught up in the moment. To think that whatever you are doing, at any given time, is the most important thing.

Back to back to back Zoom meetings and conference calls. Working from 9 pm to midnight to actually get stuff done. Feeling like you have moved from working from home to living at work.

This level of intensity is sustainable for a sprint, not for a marathon.

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There are times in life and career when you will not have balance. And that’s ok.

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Sometimes you need to lean back and let go.

During the past six months, most of us have had more time at home than ever before. The result is a mixture of relief, frustration, joy, creativity, exhaustion, connectedness, and loneliness. Lost amongst overly scheduled diaries and haphazard events.

There will be days, weeks, and months when you are not going to have balance. Your cake is going to crumble. And that’s ok.

In our life and career, we sometimes make a very conscious choice not to have balance. Such as in our very first job in our chosen profession, or when we are vying for a promotion.

At other times, imbalance is heaped upon us. Like now.

Managers may be finding this time particularly tough.

They must endeavour to buoy their team and direct reports. Yet at the same time maintain a façade of being in control. All the while managing the same array of physical and behavioural impacts, the same feelings and thoughts, the same mix of good days and bad days themself.

One of the women I mentor told me that she has not seen two of her direct reports for more than three months. They speak by phone and have weekly Zoom team meetings, yet these two have chosen not to turn-on their cameras. She is becoming increasingly anxious about them.

She also commented that she is feeling exhausted all the time. Not being able to physically connect with her team is just as much of a challenge for her as the next person.  

We talked through some strategies, the importance of seeking support from HR, and the need to acknowledge the double load she is carrying – her own and that of her team. It was all about the loss of choice and connectedness.

This new perspective gave her permission to let go and recognise she needed self-care. She wrote:

“Thank you for your ongoing support. I really found our time last week valuable in helping me to reset expectations of myself.”

Having perspective and a good helping of self-care are the ingredients that will maintain your equilibrium for the long haul.

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Figure out how to keep it in perspective. Make sure you are having fun along the way and create time for self-care. These are vital strategies to help you ride this out.

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And the cake?

Cut into individual slices, decorated with frangipanis from the garden, packaged up and delivered to the school fundraiser. Yes, it was all fine in the end.

And if I had bought a cake, well that would have been ok too.

You can have your cake and eat it too. Perhaps not all at the same time, nor in the way that you might have imaged. Yet sweet all the same.

Take care of yourself right now. So that as we come out of this strange time you are ready to jump ahead. You will be ready to be the obvious choice.

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How many of you have held a digital dinner party in the past two months? Had a virtual cup of tea with a friend? And a mobile conversation while on your 30-minute walk?

Here’s the real question. In the past two months, have you connected with an old colleague, a prior boss, or followed up with a person you met at that industry function early in the year?

Even while restrictions are relaxing in some states, and reimposed in others, we are being told to continue social distancing.

This does not mean that you should be practicing social disconnecting from your network.

Now is the perfect time to reconnect with your broader network.

Because people, just like you, are seeking human connection.

They are more likely to answer their phone.

They have the time to talk because they are not commuting, have less in-person meetings, and have more unstructured time on their hands. People are feeling isolated and are grappling with how to operate at a novel pace.

I am not saying that work-life is easy right now. What I am saying is that there is an opportunity and a desire to connect, for all of us.

While physical social distancing is being recommended right now for our safety, our career success relies on us NOT distancing ourselves from our networks.

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When networking is not working

If you feel like your networking is not working. If it is the least favourite thing on your To Do list, then try these easy steps to reconnect with people. They will work even if you’re an introvert.

1. Build your reconnection list. Start by considering who you have met. Women and men in your industry sector, similar in age and different in age. People within your current organisation, people from prior organisations, your alumni, and community.

2. Block out 10% of your diary for the next four weeks. That means making time for meaningful connections for about four hours per week.

3. Think about virtual coffee dates, walk and talk on the mobile, Facebook and LinkedIn. Invite them to an online course or meet-up. The sky is the limit.

4. Who do you want to meet and how can you do this?

5. Who can you help and how?

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Here’s how to get the conversation started

People often mistake networking small talk as talking about the weather. In fact, the small talk is about what you have in common. A relevant subject based on the situation or context or relationship you have with the person.

Small talk is about building the relationship, and talking about something that interests the other person. The aim is to create a longer conversation that is memorable for all the right reasons.

Click here for my list of conversation starters.

Allow relationships to develop naturally. Reach out and let it unfold.

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You may have heard me talk about the power of creating a Supportive Network. It’s one of the elements of the 7-Part Gravitas Model© that I use to prepare high potential women for successful promotion.

A supportive network is the way to bring the RIGHT people around you who can open doors for you that are closed to everyone else.

And NOW is the very best time to reach out and connect.

Not tomorrow.

Not next year.

Not when you are back in the office.

Make the most of the ability to now see and connect with people online and in-person. You never know where a conversation might lead.

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Be the obvious choice to the C-Suite.

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When I read this paragraph in Michelle Obama’s memoir ‘Becoming’, I just stopped. Still, and absorbed the words.

“For me, this was a turning point. The campaign apparatus existed exclusively to serve the candidate, not the spouse or the family. And as much as Barack’s staffers respected me and valued my contribution, they’d never given me much in the way of guidance.

Until that point, no one in the campaign had bothered to travel with me or show up for my events. I’d never received media training or speech prep. No one, I realised, was going to look after me unless I pushed for it.”

For the better part of a year, Michelle Obama had been on the campaign trail. Making public appearances, giving speeches, working rope lines during campaign events, speaking with reporters, doing five or six events per day.

In her own words, Michelle Obama says, “I figured I’d just work it out for myself.”

There is so much to unpack in these words — the extraordinary resourcefulness and fortitude of Michelle Obama. And the wrongness of expecting a person to operate at an elite level, without a support team. A team that would invest in her skills development, coach and support her. 

It seems unbelievable when you consider this in the context of her contribution to the success of the Obama campaign and later as First Lady.

Yet I know from my work with high potential women, and my journey to the C-Suite, that this story is not unique.

I have come to know that when you are ready to leap – when you are prepared to move to the next stage in your career, and the next and the next – you need a team of people supporting you. A board of directors that will train you, coach you, cheer you, and guide you.

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Building your Personal Board of Directors

‘A personal board of directors… is a group of people with diverse skills whom all contribute to your career, growth, and development in different ways’.

Sometimes, not knowing whom you need on your team, and when, can hold you back from asking for support.

Adapted from a concept framed by Jim Collins, the author of ‘Good to Great’, here is a description of the different types of people you may want in your support team:

1.  Trusted Advisor
The person you go to when you have a problem. The person who would never betray your confidence and you can unload all your thoughts and feelings and get trustworthy advice from.

2.  Teacher / Coach
The person you go to when you need to learn to get better at something.

3.  Cheerleader
The person you reach out to when you need a pep talk; to be reassured of your contribution and value.

4.  Elder / Guide
An experienced mentor who shares with you their life experience, knowledge and insight.

5.  Creative / Innovator
The person who sparks your ideas, challenges you and your creativity.

6.  Insight
The person who understands the lay of the land inside the organisation and provides you with tacit knowledge. They hold the insight into ‘How things work around here’.

Add a Sponsor to your support team

A sponsor is a senior level champion who believes in your potential and is willing to advocate for your next opportunity or promotion. They have the positional power, connections and motive to make it happen.

Reflecting on my career, sponsors were critical at two pivot points.

In the first example, my manager put me forward to her manager, with the words “I have someone in my team who is ready for promotion.” This first promotion, in the early years of my career, set in train a sequence of five promotions in five years within that organisation.

Later in my career, as a senior manager returning from maternity leave, a sponsor advocated for increased responsibility for me in the face of well-intentioned paternalistic caution from the CEO. Within two years, I was promoted to Chief Operating Officer, toddler in tow. 

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Start building your team

If you don’t have one of each of these people in your support network, you need to recruit. Give yourself time to do this – at least three to six months.

Allow relationships to develop naturally by reaching out and connecting to a diverse range of people in your organisations, industry, alumni, and community.

A word of caution:

• In most circumstances, your mum or dad and your best friend do not belong on your board of directors.
• Beware the naysayers who disguise their disparagement in well-placed doubts: “for your good, I just want to make sure you have thought about …”.
• Don’t take advice from unsuccessful or unhappy people.

As Oprah Winfrey says, “I don’t think anyone makes it in the world without some form of mentorship. Nobody makes it alone.”

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Be the obvious choice to the C-Suite.

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Are you frustrated by the upward movement of people who have less qualifications and experience than you?

Sometimes the person who gets the job or the promotion is not the best person for the role. They are simply better at presenting themselves to the influencers and decision-makers.

People connect with people.

Being visible, setting up trusted relationships and knowing how to build your profile are skills you need to master. And you want that to ripple out through the organisation and out into your wider industry.

This strange time working away from your office gives you a once in a career opportunity to re-set. To reframe who you are showing up as, in your work-life.

Will you settle for the same old when you return to your office? Or will you use this opportunity to create a lasting change?

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The move to a new office location eight months ago offered Chantel the opportunity to reshape her personal brand to align with her new position as General Manager. The timing was fortuitous, and she did not squander the opportunity.

“Moving to the new office and giving myself permission to step up and take ownership of the new role has improved my ability to manage complex problems without stress, better leverage my time and utilise my team.

The physical space change and a change in wardrobe helped me embrace being the leader the business needed even when I didn’t always have all the answers.”

– Chantel

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What is Personal Brand?

Your personal brand is made up of a combination of personal characteristics and traits that are unique to you.

While the subject of a brand called “You” is not new, ensuring your personal branding is right can be more challenging.

If you are planning to apply for senior roles, it is time to overhaul your personal branding to ensure it is giving you the best opportunity possible, including:

• How you sign off emails
• Your greeting when you meet people
• How you introduce yourself
• Your appearance at work including your dress, grooming, posture and bearing
• Your voicemail message
• Your photo and bio on the company intranet

Signing off internal emails with a smiley face 😊 or two kisses is unlikely to enhance your clout when you are asking for extra project funding at the next executive team meeting.

Think about how these elements cohere and represent you. A person with gravitas or someone who is a little flippant and fluctuates from one persona to another.

Have a consistent brand personality, it helps to build trust with your peers. It positions you as an authority with credibility. Incongruency and inconsistency in who you are showing up as can be seriously career limiting.

A personal brand clearly articulates who you are, what you do, and how you solve problems and help others. It makes it easier for people to see value in connecting with you.

You can then leverage it to build your profile, both internally and externally, quickly, and effectively.

Designing, creating and curating your personal brand, is not salesy, pushy, fake, contrived, aggressive, up-yourself, or any of the 1001 other stories you tell yourself.

It is who you are.

By showing up as who you are, you are solving a problem for your organisation: by giving them the best person for the role or promotion.

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It’s time to upgrade your profile.

It’s time to transform others’ perception of you.

Your qualifications and experience are a given. It’s your personal brand that will help you stand out from the crowd. Now more than ever, it’s important for you to come out from behind your invisibility cloak and connect with your peers, your team, your internal and external clients, the CEO, and the board.

When you look back at this unique time away from your usual place of work, what is it that you created. How do you want people to experience you and your contribution when you return to work? What is the message you want to be communicating?

Never be over-looked or under-recognised again.

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Be the obvious choice to the C-Suite.

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For Australians, the end of the lockdown is in sight.

As our focus begins to shift from working at home to returning to the office, career stability and longevity will take centre stage. It is affecting us all in different ways, for some a sense of excitement, others a sense of anxiety and trepidation.

For all of us, though, it is a new beginning. There is uncertainty everywhere, and few will remember how you were before.

This strange time offers you a once in a career opportunity: to re-set how you show up in your work-life. To step forward into a leadership role and show others, you are the obvious choice.

Pause Reflect Reframe

Before that happens though, do take advantage of these last days to pause and reflect.

Click here to download the checklist: 5 Things You Need To Do

In the new world, what do you want to be known for? The answer to this one question starts with first understanding who you are, what you stand for, what is important to you, what are your values. It will also be pivotal to your future success.

Do you want to be:

• Perceived as very polished and professional?
• Or perhaps more entrepreneurial and an ideas person?
• The person who can always get an audience with the CEO, the trusted advisor?
• The diplomat who can be entrusted to ease a client’s concerns?
• The person who knows the numbers and can drive a spreadsheet better than anyone else?

Being the go-to expert in a specific situation or niche helps you to attract greater recognition and more opportunities.

To be the obvious choice for the project lead or cross-functional team, charged with steering your organisation through the post-pandemic economy. It doesn’t matter what you choose. Each is a path to success. And it is up to you; you just need to be true to yourself and decide what is right for you. Your path.

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A newer version of you

I am mentoring a smart, astute, ambitious manager, with a solid record of achieving her KPIs. At the mid-career point, she is ready to take the next step in her career.

I challenged her to visualise the first minutes of her return to the office at the end of lockdown. 

I asked her to imagine, in the finest detail, standing on the top step at the entrance to the office, feeling the swish of the air-conditioning as the sliding doors open, pausing for a moment at the internal door with her hand resting on the steeliness of the door handle.

• What will she be wearing – consider colour, style, shoes, jewellery – do these clothes make her feel confident or shabby?
• What will her hair and make-up look like?
• How will she be holding her head and shoulders, what will her posture say?
• What will she have done in the preceding minutes to boost her energy? Did she run up the last few stairs, belted out her favourite song in the car, listened to a favourite upbeat podcast on the train?
• Whom is she planning to “accidentally” run into that first week?

• What lines from the best five books she dove into during lockdown, will be running through her mind?

Her return has been a complete success.

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The professional and personal choices we make every day create our future. They roll forward setting up the next decision frames and future experiences. You can reach your highest potential no matter your backstory or the set of events that led you to where you are today.

There is something immensely powerful that happens when you decide to back yourself. To do the work required, make the changes, and take steps to be the obvious choice for the next senior role. It could not be more simple yet more powerful.

It is up to you, and seek the support of others to guide and cheer you on.

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“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too.

All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favour all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way. I have learned a deep respect for one of Goethe’s couplets:

Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it!”

― William Hutchison Murray

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Be the obvious choice to the C-Suite.

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If you have been spending more than 52 seconds selecting your work outfit each morning, you are at a competitive disadvantage in your career.

Let me tell you why.

It’s about understanding the laws of dressing like a man. A man can wear the same thing every day. The clothes, “the uniform”, are a given.

In the corporate world, this translates as a suit, shirt, tie, belt, socks, shoes. In tech or creative industries, a t-shirt, pants and black shoes are de rigueur.

Here’s the thing, not dressing like a man or more precisely not approaching your wardrobe like a man, consumes energy needlessly. It diverts your creative thinking brain and takes your focus away from the preparing for that important conversation, presentation, or event.

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For many women, they do want to be more conscious and organised with their wardrobe, it is just that there is so much going on every day, things fall out of place, and wardrobe pieces accumulate.

It’s not that any one piece in their wardrobe is inappropriate or off-brand, the point is that eliminating the need to come up with a new outfit every day can reduce stress and allow the brain to prioritise other work-related decisions.

We have seen this minimalist approach to a “uniform” successfully applied by Barack Obama (remember the tan suit controversy of 2014) and Hilary Clinton. Yet will it really make a difference to your career success?

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Testing the hypothesis

Let’s say the average male middle manager’s work wardrobe consists of 15 shirts, three suits and 12 ties. Add maybe two belts and three pairs of business shoes. That’s 35 articles of clothing (not counting the drawer full of black socks). It must be pretty quick to choose what to wear, right?

With the statement “Darling, it will only take 90 seconds”, I interrupted my husband’s Sunday morning to ask for his assistance to test my hypothesis.

The time it took him to open the wardrobe, pick a shirt, pick a tie, select a suit, and grab a pair of socks and shoes was 51.75 seconds. I was so surprised that I had him repeat the routine: time taken less than a minute. Stress level less than zero.

Decision made. Mind clear. Focus and energy applied to prepare for the conversation, negotiation, interview or presentation.

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My experience in the C-Suite

The approach that worked for me over many years in senior management was having seven or eight curated go-to outfits. I didn’t subscribe to the strict interpretation of a uniform, such as the ubiquitous “white shirt with black tailored pants and black shoes every day”.

What I did have was a selection of outfits including shoes, accessories and jewellery. And I had them on rotation. Ready, ironed, aired on a Sunday evening. And to be honest, no one noticed or cared.

If you are concerned about a curated wardrobe being boring or ultra-conservative, look to women like Christine Lagarde, former President of the European Central Bank, a master at adding scarves and chunky jewellery to inject colour and her brand personality to her look.

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If you have been spending more than 52 seconds selecting your work outfit each morning, you are at a disadvantage compared to the average male in the same position.

It’s a sign that you need some order so you can be as productive, influential and astute as you need to be.

Whether ‘decision fatigue’ is a real phenomenon or an urban myth, removing wardrobe induced stress is an integral part of preserving your energy and gravitas throughout the day. So you can get on with the things that matter. You will feel authentic and put together, and you will look comfortable, confident and in control.

Now is a great time to curate your “uniform”, select and organise your own looks, ready for the return to the office. 

Retailers such as Birdsnest and apps like Pic Jointer and Stylebook can help to create outfits.

Be seen and heard for all the right reasons.

Be the obvious choice to the C-Suite.

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Psychologists will tell you confidence comes from self-efficacy. The knowledge that you can do something based on previous success in doing the task or facing the situation. This belief in your own abilities is important to your self-esteem, but also in how you respond to new or unfamiliar situations. You’ve rocked the room in team meetings, client presentations and executive briefings in the past. So, how do you adjust to a new work context like a video call or Zoom meeting? This is especially important when you remember you are always on parade. How you look and perform in facing daunting, new or different experiences will be viewed as a reflection of your abilities and your work. Confidence can be built by deliberate practice, exposure to certain situations and remembering previous successes. While there are some schools of thought that say we need to ‘fake it until we make it’, there are easier ways to boost your energy and drive your confidence. These work for in-person meetings and in the virtual world.

Stand out, from the inside out, with these 5 energy boosters:

Find a song that when it plays makes you feel happy and strong. This song can uplift your spirits and essentially shift your emotional state. Make sure you have it on your phone or playlist so you can listen to it before you log in to a video call as your power song. Have two or three go-to outfits. Why? Because being comfortable in your own skin is important and clothes are also our armour in the world. Work wear is not weekend wear, no matter how expensive the item and exercise gear is purely for going for a run, not for doing a work video call from home! Feeling uncomfortable or wearing something that you would not wear to an in-person meeting can make you appear less confident. Stylist Fiona Keary (1) recommends “having one or two blouses ironed and ready to go in the wardrobe in case of a last-minute Zoom call or meeting that you weren’t prepared for … add earrings, a pendant or a cool scarf … or pop on a blazer over your t-shirt. All of a sudden you have elevated the look and your confidence.” Standing tall, running a few stairs, power poses all work. Amy Cuddy (2) famously taught the world about power poses and you can do these anytime in the home-office or bathroom. There are other ways to get your energy up too. Run up and down a few stairs before you log into a conference call or go for a run the morning before that important Zoom meeting. You will feel better and this will shine through on the small screen.

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Control your environment before the important event. This is one of the most critical components. Create the space you need to be in. Turn off your phone and don’t check emails in the minutes before you dial in. Do not check your socials either. As much as practical, ring-fence the time by closing the door and putting a “Do Not Disturb” sign on it or negotiating a time out with a spouse or other responsible adult. Steer clear of crazy-making people. Have you ever noticed how that one email can derail your day? Make sure you are aware of those crazy-making people who destroy your confidence. Those people who break deals and destroy schedules, who expect special treatment, who discount your reality while consuming your time and energy. If someone calls and says, “Can I talk with you”, tell them you can do it later. You need to manage your confidence.

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Here’s an Exercise: Make a list of eight things that you can add to your arsenal of energy boosters this week. Post this list where it can be seen. Have some fun with it. That’s right, manage your energy, take control of it, and the difference will show! Be the obvious choice to the C-Suite. Sign up to receive future episodes direct to your inbox here.

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(1) Keary, F (2020) Top 5 tops for Zoom meetings, 35+ Where to Shop https://www.facebook.com/styleliberation/videos/226055948604319/UzpfSTYwNjcwMDQzODpWSzo3OTYwOTk0OTQyMTM2MTk/ (2) Cuddy, A (2012) Your body language may shape who you are, TEDGlobal https://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_may_shape_who_you_are?language=en